Friends are not forever after all

[vinamigo]

I'v had the same group of friends that I'v hung around with for almost all my life!!! I just started college and I'v been friends more or less with the same group of girls and boys since elementary school. Suddenly, this year, they seem like they don't like me anymore!!! And I have no clue what I did to them
They don't talk to me at all, and I'v heard that they are constantly talking behind my back and claiming that they are superrrr annoyed at me for the stupidest reasons!!!! Like for my interests and stupid stuff like that
Just all of a sudden...I'm beginning to see them in a different way- as not very good friends!!! I'v never done one mean thing to any of them, it just seems lately like they dont like me, for being me.
They mean the world to me, so it's not like I can just drop them like that and find new friends....
and I have talked to them twice before, and asked them what I did wrong, and why they are annoyed at me, and they act all nice and say they would never be mad!!!
And now, Im scared to even open my mouth in front of my best friends!!! because I know anything I say..anything at all, will be repeated amongst them later
Why, why, why are they doing this??? What should I do??? Any adviceý.???

[robertfarhat]

Be cool forget about them you'll find new friends.

[jestuarn]

I'm not much of atrue friends forever type of person. Sometimes, when we thought we knew them they'll change. I don't blam ethem though, human are ever-changing. That's what we do to adapt. Hey, the world evolves.

You had to think carefully, are those friends are close enough to be a family? What are you to them(since most people who thought they were best friends were one-sided)? Lastly do you want to committed to be at their side, no matter what and are you perfectly sure, that when you got married,or have kids, that you still will spend as much time needed for you to be at their side?

Crazy-sounded questions, aren't they? It's the truth, though.

Listen, friends who turns family are forever, but family who turns into friends won't stay long.

[schiphaxa]

hi

I do agree with jestuarn, regarding peaple changing & us having to adapt part.

Even if some of your friends are not being as friendly as they were before it does not mean that they are not ur friends anymore. It just means that their life is also changing and they are adapting to their life. I know it can be very difficult time for anyone.

And maybe that its not them that has become different but it is you.

Or it maybe that both parties have misunderstandings. what u need to do is talk to your friends about things. Thats the only way you'll be able to solve the problem - one way or another.

[schiphaxa]

hi!

jetsuarn, are you sure that you are not a 'true friend forever' type?

I mean, i am not critisizing ok, but i seem a little bitter.

All what you've said is true to some extent, but that does not apply to everyone hmm, not to many.

There are a lot of friends who've been together since grade school, and still close friends now, who has children in grade school. So...

Sorry if I've offended ok, didnt mean to.

[jestuarn]

it's okay.

About what i said, it's from first person experience. Many of my friends, whom I consider ordinary friends,claim in front of other people that I was their best friend. All I could do was gap, and slowly nod. I coulnd't say I'm not their best friend, but I coulnd't say I am either. I've once tried to be clear, I am her friend , but not the best. the result were very nice.

You see, I'm not trying to brag here, but its just people like to come to me to share their problems, even more than their family. And somehow, they felt they got close to me. It kinda makes me frustrated, you know, to be appreciated as the 'most understanding' friend, yet I felt it as a lie.And I don't even know which part was wrong.

I was hoping someone could teach me what is the meaning of true friendship, but I couldn't ask the ones who thought me as one. They tried to explain, but it still isn't convincing, since they were blinded by their friendship with mind. Like they put on a wall or something to sheild them from certain truth. :cry:

[noodlebunny]

Long seperations from friends will lead to animosity, if you can, spend as much time with your friends as possible and get to know each other. When away from them, keep in touch and everything will be fine. A fight every now and then means you guys are real friends.