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friendship abused
I know that friends is a wonderful thing in this world. The great feeling of giving/receiving without any other interest involved is amazing. Turns out that even the closest friends can make this relationship turn into a giver/taker kind of relationship.
It happened to me with my friend. Somehow, i'm a natural giver and after a couple of years being close to him, it seems that he felt that and used to take advantage of it. He was jobless and I had a job. One day i actually helped him to get a job and he lost it because he didn't show up one day. I used to get so mad at seeing how he'd waste his time and money but i'd still keep on lending him money. Sometimes i'd made him a 500$ cheque but most of the time it was small amounts (20,40...). This situation never got better until i frankly told him that he cannot borrow money like that forever and have to kick his ass and get his own job.
from that day onwards, he stopped complaining about himself, found a job and even if it's low paid, he manages to go through. Our friendship ended up badly because it was only a matter of interest. Now things are better, and sometimes giving and taking can really mess up a relationship. Never forget that giving is not always a good thing. Even to a close friend. When you think that you're helping that person, it turns out that you're actually making them more dependant. If you have a friend like that who don't have enough discipline and keep asking for you help, my advice is help him the right way. Help him find a job, help him find a cheaper room.... but don't give him money. It doesn't help anything.
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